Not a bad idea, but...
Your sync to the percussion is terribly, terribly off.
The instruments aren't bad, but the song feels underpowered and over-dissonant until 1:32 to 1:50-something, when everything syncs up in an ear-pleasing rather than an ear-grating fashion--
--but after that short period, it all falls apart all over again.
Sorry to say, but even if you threw this together in your spare time, I'd have thought that you'd at least take an ear to your efforts, and try to not make this sound so fractured.
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